How to Stay Motivated When You Always Fall Off the Wagon
Practical mindset shifts and habit-stacking techniques for long-term success
Let’s be honest—falling off the wagon isn’t the problem. It’s staying off that wagon that holds you back.
You start strong with a new routine, maybe even feel amazing for a week or two, but then… life happens.
Work gets busy.
A grandchild gets sick.
You sleep badly.
And suddenly, it feels easier to just stop and start again someday.
Sound familiar?
If you’re a woman in midlife, you’re not alone.
This season of life is filled with shifting hormones, changing bodies, and real-life stressors that can make consistency feel like an impossible dream.
But guess what?
You don’t need perfect motivation. You just need the right mindset—and a plan that fits your real life.
Here’s how to stay motivated even when you feel like you’re always starting over.
1. Reframe “Falling Off the Wagon”
The first shift? Stop seeing slip-ups as failures.
Seriously.
That whole “wagon” metaphor is outdated and punishing. Falling off implies you’ve ruined everything. But in reality, you’ve just paused.
That’s normal. You’re human.
And it’s especially common for women navigating midlife changes.
Try this instead:
“I’m practicing.”
You’re not failing—you’re learning how to create a life that feels good and supports your health. And practice doesn’t have to be perfect.
2. Ditch All-or-Nothing Thinking
If you’ve ever said:
“I was doing great but then I missed two workouts, so I stopped.”
“I had a cookie at lunch so I blew the whole day.”
“If I can’t do it perfectly, I may as well wait until Monday.”
That’s all-or-nothing thinking. And it’s one of the biggest motivation killers out there.
Here’s the mindset shift: “Some is always better than none.”
✔️ Walk for 10 minutes instead of 30.
✔️ Do five stretches before bed.
✔️ Drink one glass of water.
✔️ Eat a nourishing breakfast, even if dinner’s a little chaotic.
Consistency isn’t about doing everything—it’s about doing something, repeatedly.
3. Build Habits That Work With Your Life, Not Against It
Forget what Instagram says.
You don’t need a 2-hour morning routine and a fridge full of perfectly chopped veggies.
You need habits that slide into your actual life.
Here’s where habit stacking comes in. Coined by James Clear in Atomic Habits, habit stacking means linking a new habit to something you already do every day.
Try these:
After I brush my teeth, I’ll stretch for 2 minutes.
While my coffee brews, I’ll do 5 bodyweight squats.
When I change into pajamas, I’ll take 3 deep breaths.
Small, doable, and anchored to something you’re already doing. That’s how you make habits stick.
4. Focus on How You Want to Feel, Not Just What You Want to Lose
Yes, we all want to feel good in our jeans. But what’s even more motivating in midlife?
✔️ More energy to get through the day.
✔️ Less joint pain and stiffness.
✔️ Better sleep.
✔️ A calmer mind.
✔️ Confidence in your body’s strength.
So instead of focusing only on the scale or a pant size, ask yourself each morning:
“What can I do today that will help me feel stronger, calmer, and more energized?”
That kind of motivation lasts longer than any short-term goal.
5. Make It Visible (and Rewarding)
Your brain loves rewards. Use that to your advantage.
Try this simple trick: track your habits in a visible way.
Use a paper calendar and give yourself a gold star or a checkmark every day you do your habit—even if it’s just for 2 minutes.
It sounds silly, but there’s something deeply satisfying about seeing that visual streak build. And it creates momentum.
You can also add a small reward:
- After 5 days of movement, treat yourself to a cozy new candle.
- After 10 days of nourishing meals, book a pedicure.
- After 3 weeks of consistent bedtime, plan a morning walk with a friend.
Make the habit its own celebration.
6. Anchor to Your “Why”
Motivation fades.
Life gets busy.
But your why—your deeper reason—can carry you through.
So let’s dig a little. Why do you want to move more, eat better, sleep deeper?
- To have the energy to travel in your 70s and 80s?
- To model healthy habits for your kids or grandkids?
- To feel good in your body as you age?
- To reduce the risk of chronic disease?
Write your why down. Keep it somewhere you’ll see it. Repeat it to yourself on the days you feel like skipping everything.
Your why is your North Star.
7. Let It Be Easy
Not everything needs to be a project. One of the best mindset shifts for midlife women?
Let healthy living be simple. Even soft.
You can:
- Roll out of bed and stretch for 3 minutes.
- Take a walk around the block before dinner.
- Add a handful of greens to your scrambled eggs.
- Take a deep breath when you feel overwhelmed.
These small choices, repeated over time, create incredible momentum. You don’t have to hustle your way to health. You can nurture it.
8. Start Again—As Many Times As It Takes
The women who feel strong and healthy in midlife aren’t the ones who never mess up.
They’re the ones who start again.
Over and over.
With grace.
With curiosity.
With kindness toward themselves.
If you fall out of your routine for a day, a week, or even a month? That’s okay.
Start small.
Start today.
Start now.
The wagon isn’t going anywhere—it’s just waiting for you to hop back on when you’re ready.
Keep in mind
Staying motivated isn’t about willpower or perfection. It’s about setting yourself up for success—with realistic habits, flexible mindset shifts, and a whole lot of self-compassion.
You are not too old.
It is not too late.
You don’t need to earn a fresh start—you just get to choose it.
Today.
Again and again.
Remember: every time you fall off the wagon, you’re just practicing how to get back on with a little more ease, a little more wisdom, and a lot more grace.
Ready to Gently Reset and Start Feeling Like You Again?
If you’re tired of falling off the wagon and ready to build momentum that actually sticks, I’ve created something just for you:
✨ The Longevity Starter Kit
This gentle, realistic program gives you:
- Simple at-home workouts to build strength and mobility
- Easy, nourishing meal ideas (no strict diets!)
- Practical mindset tools to break the all-or-nothing cycle
- A flexible roadmap to help you feel energized and confident—without the overwhelm
The Starter Kit is designed to help you take the first doable steps toward a stronger, calmer, more vibrant life—at your own pace, in a way that feels good in your real life.
👉 Click here to get The Longevity Starter Kit and start showing up for yourself, one small step at a time.
Because you don’t need to be perfect. You just need a place to begin.
